Tenor and Me

Ive now spent my birthday money from January on my new Tenor Recorder and its so mellow and soulful. I'm glad I worked through the Alto first to see if I could stick with it. The Alto hurt my deaf ear on the high notes and that's why I have decided to go down a few octaves. Its a stretch for my fingers but Ill get used to it.

One thing I don't understand though, is how come the Alto was in the key of F and the Tenor is in the key of C and I can just play the same songs on both using the same holes. Does any one know? Does anyone care?

And twice now I have seen my eyes as blue in photos.

Crazy Stuff

Friends - a couple of crazy things happened to me today. First I woke up I saw a strange arm right next to me. Immediately thought about the blokes that would rather naw their arm off rather than wake the person they brought home the previous night... It took a few moments to realize it was my arm, but a thinner arm. You know the part where the leg of mutton sleeves usually sit. That's the part that's shrunk. Then just now sitting down to do some blogging I heard my phone beep with a message so I went to my bag and had to empty it out on the table because its so full of junk I couldn't find the phone. In the meantime this little froggy (pictured) appeared. I'm so slack now on the chocoholic frenzies I must have forgotten to eat it weeks ago, coz I cant remember buying it. Hes safely tucked inside my belly now. But this really concerns me because it means I'm not driven to eat every piece of sweet thing I can find. Its a sign of the responsible adult emerging.

Personal Best

Today is one of those "taking it up a notch" days. I walked 6.8kms around the lake. Ive been wanting to do it for the past 2 years but was too scared that my knees would get 1/2 way round and then give out. My friend Ebbs has been here for 4 short days and I asked her to take me on this walk before she left to go back to Moama. This woman has in the past,taken me to some very unusual places... like tobogganing down the side of a snowy mountain in a tractor tube.. ... up a huge mountain by foot to see the most awesome views of Halls Gap in Victoria. Both those times I was utterly exhausted, thinking I cant make it and both those times my spirit soared smoothly for days afterwards on the high of sucsess. Today is no different. I'm so sleepy, so happy and so hopeful. I feel like a floppy puppy all contented. I love Miss Ebberle... we address each other as Miss Ebberle and Miss Scott always. When we went into a shop yesterday talking to each other like this, the lady behind the counter asked me if I was Miss Ebberles school teacher. It was a total crack up.

Art Therapy 16

Yesterday we worked with ideas around boundaries and authenticity. This is my drawing of what authenticity looks like to me. It has clear boundaries, its transparent, its has healing (green) inside and out and opaque parts that are solid.

My question was to myself last night can you be authentic and have no boundaries? Ive come up with yes. The reason is when I was living in Katherine there was a scene down the river where some traditional people were hanging out. There was a woman crying that loud deep hurting that is soul crushing. Because it was in the riverbed it echoed what seemed to be the length of the Katherine River all the way to the sea. Ill never forget that sound. At that time I felt she had very little in the way of boundaries but was still in some way 100% authentic.

Random 2

Two weeks ago I saw a young girl (17 ish)with her baby about a month old at the food court. The girl looked like she had been doing it hard. Looked like shes been anorexic or on drugs at one stage. She was the image of a woman totally in love with her baby. I decided that I would go to Daryl Lee just down the corridor a bit and buy her a box of chocolates. When I returned it looked like her mother had joined her. I was a bit hesitant, will I or wont I approach them and decided bugger it I will. I walked up to their table and gave the girl the chocolates and said Ive been watching you and you are such a beautiful mother that I wanted to buy you this box of chocolates. She said thanks and I just took off.

Anyway on my way out at lunch time I saw her again. Shes had a hair cut and looked all dressed up and the baby did too. She didn't see me but I put up so many prayer for this cute couple.

Random Acts Of Kindness

At the lights in the city today, the windscreen washer guy came to me. I motioned "No" because I had just been through the car wash. After the upsetting time at church, I thought I needed to do an Act of Kindness. So I motioned him back and gave him the 70 cents I had left. He was wrapped. Then he went straight to this young girls car and started washing her windscreen. She was gesturing "No" rigorously but he kept right on. By the time the lights changed colour there were 3 smiling people... The washer guy, the young girl and me.

Angelika

Today I went to Braidwood to buy my nephew (Adrian) his birthday present (20 today). I couldn't get the bamboo socks I wanted for him in Canberra so I drove 86km to Braidwood for them. If you are a "Comfy Sock" maiden like me then these are the pinnacle of comfy socks. They are warm in winter, cool in summer and have an anti-bacterial natural action. While I was there I met 4 people I knew. 3 of them live there and then Angelika, my new German friend was just coming in the door as I was going out of the material shop. We couldn't believe it. We often do this. Think about each other then one of us rings or texts. I said wheres your car? She said its the Silver one just over there. It was parked right next to mine.

I spent time at the local Catholic Church praying. It was lovely. It has fabulous stained glass windows. I always visit it when in Braidwood.

6:38am

View from my window this morning. I love having my little digital camera, that I can just whip out and snap a beuatuiful moment in nature. The front section of my appartment was awash in this awesome pinky orange. Godde you are so.......

Todays Quote - Anonymous

God doesn't give you the people you want, He gives you the people you NEED. To help you, to hurt you, to leave you, to love you and to make you into the person you were meant to be.

This has come at the right time for me.

Botanical Gardens

How beautiful this yellow, gray and deep green go together? Nothing like the botanical gardens to sooth my spirit. The sounds and sights, the gently breeze, so cool brushing my face gently. I'm puring.

So Much Suffering

I saw this amazing clip on RAGE briefly today. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5J-WpgOzW9A rarley do I watch TV except Sundays when alot of art stuff is on TV. The film clip is meaning so much more to me now that Im doing the Art Therapy. Ive become so much more in tune with feelings and symbols, signs. More in touch with the spiritual life. I asked Aileen last week is that what Art Therapy is designed to do and she said yes that's the whole point. As she has degrees in art, I asked her do they teach that as part of your art degree. She said they don't, its all about techniques ect... all the hard skills. Art Therapy teaches you the soft skills.

For the last 3 days three different friends have poured out their pain to me. I try to reflect back to them what their strengths are and try to part with them looking alot happier. I just wish I was better at this stuff. Its always an honour when someone cries in my company. They always apologize but I tell them that it is an honour for me because that means they trust me. That trust is everything to me. Its more important than liking someone, although having that combo is the ultimate. For me watching them cry shows me they are vulnerable, which then leaves me the space to love them more. I think its a real strength to be able to show how you are feeling. I walk away from those situations feeling valued, with a softness about me that I like. I quite often join in with their crying and since being in Canberra I have learned to cry silently, which is way more painful than the keening I used to do in Katherine.

The Little Prince

"One only understands the things that one tames...if you want a friend tame me..."

Ive been given this book by my friend Jodi who has tamed me and I love both the book and Jodi.

Last night I went to dinner with a lady who I am becoming friends with. During a conversation I said "come on lets go home and I will paint your nails for you". Well she didn't want to she said shes not ready for that. Taming in process. I love her honesty. Shes already done alot of taming of me. And for that I am grateful.

Clothing Education Changed My Life For The Better

When I arrived in Canberra 5 years ago, I had to wear all my "going out" clothes (3 items) to work. The other clothes were not acceptable. Luckily I was being paid Travel Allowance for the first 3 months and went to buy "Winter" clothes. I made the mistake of buying clothes that were too heavy for me and caused me to overheat most of the time, not to mention they were all in earthy tones. After about a year, I could see I was still struggling so I went to an Image/Colour Consultant and things started to get better from there. Over a period of 6 months I had upgraded my wardrobe to consist of the "Cool Winter" colours. I started getting comments, like gee that bright purple looks great on you. You are looking so well, blah blah. So up until now, Ive only concentrated on have clothing that meets with the colour and image requirements.

Now Sabah comes into my life. The fabulous dressmaker. I'm updating my wardrobe to be only natural fibres. They are tran seasonal apparently, and I've just noticed how comfortable they really make me feel. For most people this means an ironing obsession but I refuse to iron. Most of my clothes will be the scrunch dry type. I am hoping to cull allot of clothes to end up with a small amount of items, 1 Wool Coat, 1 Jacket, 3 Linen Trousers, 4 T Shirts, 3 long dresses, 2 Tunics and 3 long skirts. This maybe over kill but I will fine tune it as I go along.

Even though it cost $380 to have the colours and image done, I know it has saved me money in the long run. Prior to having the consultaion, I would buy clothes because 1. they were in my size 2. I liked the colour or 3. they were cheap. And because I cant see myself it was all wrong on so many levels. I now find I wear all my clothes and there are none that are pushed to the back of the wardrobe. And I dont have to stop to think will this go with this as all the colours in the swatch go together.

Courage

Theresa is still not back at St Ninians and they told us today we have to vote if we want her back on the 22nd of March. This is so painful. I'm only hanging in because I want to continue to have her preaching in my life. I been through one of these situations before in Bendigo and a young priest just left without warning. We all grieved as I am sure he did too.

On the up side I always sit with Marie (45+), who has Downs Syndrome and have a cupper after the service. When I first started going there I realized she always sat at a table away from everyone else, with no other chairs for people to sit down and talk to her if they wanted to. I cant stand her being ostrasized and I always sit with her. Marie is the grown up one and has the tea and I have the cordial. Shes such a darling and loves everyone. Sometimes when certain types walk past us, she sticks her thumb up and starts laughing really loud. I have to join her coz its so bloody funny. Sometimes I stick my finger up too, but I hide it behind my other hand so only Marie can see. She loves it, I love it, its out secret.

I found this interesting article on Judith Scott, an amazing weaver who had Downs Syndrome and total deafness. If you go to this site you will see an adorable picture of her twin sister and her as Littlies. http://www.hidden-worlds.com/judithscott/entwined.htm

Dress Ups

Sabah has made for me the most beautiful dress of all time. Its a Linen blend, plum in colour with a deep Burgundy ribbon around the arms and the hem. Its fitted around the waist with a zipper in the back. Shes done a lovely job on it and it only cost me $80. I'm getting her to make me some Black Linen Trousers next.This is the brooch I wore tonight when I went out with Doris and Melita. I actually feel very feminine in it and I am going to wear it to Theresa's ordination to priesthood if she invites me. From now on I am only buying trans seasonal fabric which is all the natural fibres such as Linen (my favorite), cotton, silk and wool. It just feels so much nicer on. What made me twig to all this is when I went on my retreat last month and walked in the biblical gardens I sandwiched a flax leaf in my hands as I ran them along the length of the leaf the leaf felt cold. When I ran my hand along the leaf the second time the leaf was warm to my touch.

Godde, you are so amazing. I'm so glad you are a female and you created me. Thank you Godde.

Crooked Cups

This is how I am feeling (Picture right) at the moment with the upheaval in the my local church. Ive been having a stirred up tummy. My lovely lovely Minister Theresa has been forced to take extended leave(up to 3 months), while the Uniting Church decides just how "Uniting" they will be. This is no fault of Theresa and as I write this Im smiling to myself that this amazing woman is doing just what shes always loved. Fighting for Justice. Her situation will be a test case for the Uniting Church. Will they allow her to be a Minister in the Uniting Church as well as a Deacon and then later a Priest in the Anglican Church in honarary roles?

The Uniting Church is still a young church and they are cutting their teeth on Theresa's bones. She strong, resilient and courageous. She asks for what she wants and Id say nearly always gets it.

I think they would be crazy to let her go. And if she goes...............well Ill have to find another faith family who has a woman leader. Just when I was all settled and and feeling strong myself.....

Chocolate Fudge

In the late 70s I was the chocolate fudge queen of Dowling Street. After many burnt saucepans, I perfected the art of fudge. The recipe was from the Green and Gold, where they used words like "remove from the fire". It was compiled in 1923 as a fundraiser for a school in S.A. What an earner, its till going strong. Whats inspired me? Well Ive never known anyone to make it like me. Well Leigh Hill came pretty close.

Yesterday I rang dad (who has mums Green and Gold) asked him to read me out the chocolate Fudge and Coconut Ice recipe so I could take a trip down memory lane. While I was cooking the batch of fudge all these memories came flooding back with the certain smells the cooking process goes through. It turned out perfect and I thought to myself, the old girls still got it in her....


Then I rang Simmone and said Ive just cooked something I haven't cooked since I was about 17. She said "whats that? I don't remember you cooking anything ever". I laughed so much coz she was right. I cant really make useful things. Then I told her and we went hand in hand down memory lane again. I'm happy to say I'm still a sugar ant and I can face Chocolate Fudge first thing in the morning. However Coke is definitely out.

2 1/2 cups of sugar
1/4 pound butter (250g)
2 tablespoons cocoa
½ Cup FC Milk
Vanilla Essence

Combine milk and sugar in the saucepan on low heat stirring. Once sugar is dissolved add butter and cocoa. Cook gently for 1/2 hour until mixture hangs like a stalactite off the spoon. Add essence then beat with electric beater until the mix thickens and you can see ridges that don’t melt back in to the bulk of the mix. Turn into a pan covered with glad bake. Just before its fully set cut into squares. Refrigerate and bring out first thing in the morning before breakfast as an entree.

Ill let you know if I have an outbreak of boils.